Hallelujah!

I really couldn't be more elated, excited and emotional as I write today's post! As you can probably guess, we got wonderful news today from Hope's oncologist! The margins of Hope's tumor came back FREE AND CLEAR of any cancer!!! Praise God!!

This is such a huge blessing and such an amazing miracle, considering that the oncologist originally told us that a tumor the size of Hope's was basically inoperable. She told us that even if the bulk of the tumor was removed, what was left would likely grow back and make her quality of life unbearable, or she would be left with a improperly functioning urinary tract that would make her life unbearable. Neither of those things have happened, and we believe it's because we said TONS of prayers for Hope and had TONS of people praying right along with us. God is awesome and we are so thankful! :)

The last couple of weeks have been such an emotional roller coaster for us. Five weeks ago we were dealing with the shock of her cancer diagnosis. A few days later, we were overwhelmed to find out that even with extensive treatment, her chances for a full recovery weren't as good as we had imagined. Just over four weeks ago, we were elated that her tumor was shrinking rapidly. Less than two weeks later, our tension started to grow as Hope's tumor began to do the same. By the time last Sunday rolled around, I was pretty much a basket case, as Hope's tumor reached its largest size, and we recalled the oncologist's original poor prognosis. Then last week, we were slightly encouraged by the surgeon's more positive outlook, but highly stressed as we awaited the pathology report. All I can say is that today when Chad called and said "they got it," I literally wept for joy. In my entire life, I can't remember ever sobbing because I was so happy and relieved!

While I know that cancer diagnosis and treatment is generally a series of ups and downs, I can't help but think that this wouldn't have been nearly as difficult if Hope's oncologist hadn't been quite as negative at the onset. I understand that she doesn't want to give people false hope, but I also wish she would have left us with a little more hope than she did. Maybe she truly believed that Hope's tumor couldn't be removed successfully, but the skeptic in me wonders if she wasn't just making her own involvement with chemotherapy more justifiable. Obviously, shrinking the tumor with chemo before surgery would have been ideal, but clearly, it wasn't the only solution. I just wish that she would have at least consulted with the surgeon before giving us her prognosis, so that we would have known there was still a chance that surgery could work even if the chemo didn't. I shed so many tears thinking that all hope (and Hope) was lost because the tumor wasn't small enough, devastated by the thought that she wouldn't survive. We could have avoided a lot of unnecessary heartache had we known there was still hope for Hope!

I would probably give the oncologist the benefit of the doubt if it wasn't for the fact that she has recommended that we continue chemo for Hope even though there is no sign of cancer left in her body. Her thought is that there is a slim possibility that there could be microscopic cancerous cells that could have migrated into other nearby tissue, and that maybe a few more rounds of chemo would take care of them. This seems like a questionable strategy for several reasons, but mostly because the chemo didn't seem to killing Hope's cancer cells in the first place! Chad and I have yet to discuss this option or meet with the oncologist in person, so we may still consider it, but at this point it doesn't seem like a very logical choice.

All oncological drama aside, we could not be more thankful for Hope's miraculous recovery, nor could we be more thankful for all of the prayers and support during the last few weeks from our family and friends. Thank you all so much! We will definitely rejoice in this day for many months to come!